“The saddest summary of life contains three descriptions: could have, might have, and should have.” ~Unknown I'd simply say: coulda, woulda, shoulda. If we look back, our lives all probably have many turning points. Places in them where, if we had made a different choice, our days would have a radically contrary look to them. If I had taken that job out of state, not gone on that vacation, not taken a unique way to a familiar locale, gone to a different high school or college, grown up with other friends, what might my world look like today? Why am I contemplating this today? Here is a house, located on Deering Avenue, that my parents almost bought. They visited it quite a few times with their real estate agent, but in the end decided that the area was too busy with traffic for four small children. They went with the bigger house at the end of a quiet street at the foot of Back Bay, and that has made all the difference. What's your 'road not taken'?
Hi Birdman, I was born in a little Scottish village and I sometimes wonder if my Dad had not had a bit of gypsy in him and emigrated out to Africa when he came back from the war, at the age of 36, with a young family it was a brave move. I was four at the time, and was twenty one when I left to come to Australia. It was the best childhood ever, such fantastic memories. I often wonder if I would have stayed in Scotland all those years ago if Dad hadn't made that move..I wouldn't have met my husband, wouldn't have had two fantastic children, I might have had horrible ones haha! You're right, it is interesting to ponder these things now and again!!
ReplyDeleteI'm frequently struck by the way the roads my ancestors took and the roads I have taken seem to have led to better roads, even tho they seemed like reckless roads at the time. We tend not to think woulda-coulda-shoulda but rather glad-I-didn't (stay put/take that less-reckless road). But back to the house photo--my husband and I occasionally drive by a small house we almost bought. We are curious about who lives there now and what lives they lead, but we don't wish we'd bought that one.
ReplyDeleteHey SC- I do too... every time I pass this house.
ReplyDeleteno coulda-shoulda-wouldas here. how strange. i'm sure there must be some. but in the end, the choices made always seem to be the choices that have fit. so option b has faded from memory.
ReplyDeleteI suppose I couda-shouda-wouda make a list, but I'm old enough now not to waste time with regrets. I'm happy where I am and am glad to have had all the opportunities that have come my way.
ReplyDeleteI guess I sometimes wonder how I would have turned out if I had grown up in Japan like a regular Japanese kid, usually when I stumble over words I still can't read or write. But for some reason, I'm pretty sure I'd be almost exactly who I am now no matter what path I took :-D
ReplyDeleteInteresting discussion you stimulated today, Birdman. I'm a look-ahead kind of guy. There have been so many forks, I can't dwell on them. I did the best I could and when my parents were making the decisions they did the best they could. Life has turned out exceptionally well and I can't (won't) complain.
ReplyDeleteHmmm...you got me to thinking about similar decisions over the years, all the way from my parents choice not to buy a certain house to my choice of selling my house in Mesa Arizona and moving to Phoenix about 6 years ago.
ReplyDeleteI sometimes wonder how/who I would be had my parents stayed in Louisiana instead of moving to south Florida (SO not the south!). For one thing, I wouldnt have lost my southern accent (but is that really so terrible?!) I'm so glad I experienced such diversity in that multicultural melting pot. I'm also glad I left, though - it was too fast and furious! I prefer a smaller city to raise my family. I suppose it's best to be thankful for what is now. And to always remember when feeling down and unsure...it could be worse.
ReplyDeleteI'm with Brattcat and Jack on this one. You make the best choices at the time and move forward. To me, it's a waste to think about what might have been. I prefer to concentrate on the present and future. Btw, looks like a cute house from the pic.
ReplyDeleteIt is a nice looking two family. I think you can drive yourself crazy thinking what might have been. It's an interesting exercise to think of such things occasionally, but it's better to look onward and upward. Leave sliding doors to books and the movies.
ReplyDeleteIf I had it to do over I would probably do it the same - maybe some minor decisions would have been different but overall I can't complain!
ReplyDeleteSome things you can control and others you can't. I often wonder what I would be like if my mother had not passed away when I was only 18 months old. I have learned that it is best not to dwell on it. This is a beautiful house though. I love those windows!
ReplyDeleteNot having stayed in England when we moved back to France. I could have boarded at an English school rather than become totally francised. Frenchised. How do you say that?
ReplyDeleteWe owned an historic house in our small town and decided to keep living on our farm....in the boondocks! lol It has made all the difference.
ReplyDeleteHi big bird! You don't wanta know! But you're right.
ReplyDeleteStill, one must move on. We have only this moment...the past is gone never to return and the future is unknown...
Coming to St. Louis for college rather than staying in New York. Going out on St. Patrick's Day night in 1973 when my roommate and I had a buck and a half between us, which led to meeting the woman I've been married to for 37 years. Buying my first digital camera in 1999. We all have these quantum fluctuations. If a butterfly flits its wings in Africa today, will I get my post up tomorrow morning?
ReplyDeleteI did it. I moved to Santa Fe, no more should of.
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