On Saturday, we left Oviedo in a light shower and headed for the coast, but by the time we had settled into our chairs on Cocoa Beach, the sun was peaking through clouds and it had turned hot. Now a 'yellow flag' flying at a lifeguard stand in Florida means moderate hazard. Usually speaking, this is an indication of surf conditions, but this day it meant just a wee bit more. Next to us, near a stretch of boardwalk, was a group of older guys selling woven palms and roses and taking on an 18 pack of Colt 45s. Beer not the gun. The most vocal of the guys kept us smilin' for hours. Here's a few of his profound thoughts (note lots of slurring of words and f-bombs):
"Beer's cheaper at Winn-Dixie. No doubt about it... I like this 100.3 light rock station. But who the heck is this John Tesh though... It's hot. Want a piece of KFC? I got a whole pizza too... in my backpack. Bought it for a couple of f&%*en homeless chicks, but even they didn't want it...hahahaha... It's not that great... Really. Listen to this. Last night there was this crazy broad with a camera photographing the sky. No stars or moon out. She's just snappin' away... at the street lamp. I'm sayin' what are ya doin'? She says takin' pictures. I say no, what are you f*^#ken doing? I'm doing some K2, but I want some of what you're 'doing'. hahahaha... Pictures in black of night with a flash... Last night... Life's amazing! I'm 48. I've got two grand kids... Believe it... I won't see their kids. Won't live that long... Believe it! (starts singing along with radio ) 'You are so beautiful to me. Don'tcha see...' I'm so hot. Hey, can I buy you a beer? Funny story. True though. Last night... I was thinkin' who's my biggest enemy in the whole world? I'm lookin' at my beer bottle. True story. Honest. No, I WON'T Shut up!"
There was more.
He talked non-stop for over 2 hours.
Occasionally, I'd glance over at Elenka.
She'd be smiling.
The guy had an opinion about everything under the sun.
After our visit to the beach, we needed a vacation.
We stopped for a DQ.
After ALL the 'entertainment', I needed a blizzard!
Was that you listening to me? Gee, why didn't you introduce yourself?
ReplyDeleteYou will find all kinds of weird things in Florida waters and on Florida beaches!
ReplyDeletelol...i wonder if that was a cdp photographer snapping away at the lamp post ha!
ReplyDeleteSounds like an interesting dude... I don't know how long I'd be able to listen though!
ReplyDeleteYou might have done better to just walk on down the beach until you couldn't overhear any drunks. Not sure you can learn much listening to them.
ReplyDeleteHilarious! Sometimes those drifting conversations make you smile. On my drive back to Phoenix last Saturday I stopped in Tucson to have dinner at my favorite Mexican Restaurant. There were three twenty-somethings sitting at the next table and one of the young ladies was talking about food. She told the others about someone who came to work and brought some soup she had made. The young lady tasted it an like it and asked what brand it was. The other woman said I made it. The twenty-something girl said I didn't know you could name soup. I thought it came in a can. I'm glad I wasn't swallowing right at the moment I heard that.
ReplyDeleteMake....I didn't know you could make soup is what that line is supposed to say.
ReplyDeleteoh, i'd have tired of him in about 5 min.
ReplyDeleteI swear that he has an Italian-speaking twin brother here in Livorno, who drinks Heineken and speaks about the same...
ReplyDeleteI think I ran into his cousin online in the last couple of days. This guy can't finish one sentence without drifting into something completely different.
ReplyDeleteI'd have lost patience inside of ten minutes.
I'm laughing, hear me? Ya gotta love people in general.
ReplyDeleteThat's Florida!
ReplyDeletePeople are the best entertainment!
ReplyDeleteI've been in our local pub and had guys like this at the next table - great entertainment!!
ReplyDeleteGuys like that can be fun sometimes. I know one or two.
ReplyDeleteThat's pretty funny! I spent this past weekend in Orlando visiting my daughter and grandkids, so you weren't too far from where I was. I spent my entire Saturday inside a high school gymnasium watching the "Miss Majorette of Florida" competition. Except for the few minutes I got to watch my granddaughter perform, I think I would have rather been on the beach with you and Elenka listening to those characters.
ReplyDeleteColt 45 is poison. It made me so sick once in college...
ReplyDeleteHow did you run into one of my clients in Florida?
Nice colors around there.
ReplyDeleteSome folks just feel compelled to talk, even when they don't have much to say.
ReplyDelete